Question:
I am maid of honor in a wedding where the bride and groom are being married in a very small ceremony and then having a reception 2 weeks later. I want to have a ladies lunch for the bride and the women in her life, but don't want to make it a "shower" as many of the women will not be invited to the actual wedding. How do you suggest going about this and wording it correctly in the invite?
Answer:
Dear Julie,
Here's a way to pull it off. Start by choosing an invitation that has a bachelorette luncheon motif. That way your invitees will not be left guessing as to whether or not a gift is required. Rules for a bachelorette party or luncheon are a lot looser than are rules for bridal showers. Any party that looks remotely like a shower bears the obligation for a guest to bring a gift. Bypass any misunderstandings by choosing an invitation that looks bachelorette-ish but not shower-ish.
Specify on the invitations that the luncheon is to be R.S.V.P.'d by phone and email. Of course, make sure your email address is clearly printed on the invitation. The R.S.V.P. requirement is your shoo-in to kindly advise callers and emailers that their presence is longed for, but no gift is required.
Whether you speak to guests on the phone or return emails to them, a simple "Cindy, I know you realize the bride has to keep her guest list very short due to space but ________ (bride's name) really wants to celebrate with you and hopes you'll be joining us for her bachelorette luncheon. I'm setting this up as a really fun party, but it's not a shower, so don't worry that you have to bring a gift. We just really want you to be there!" Your guests will grin with delight at being invited to this lovely party!
More advice on the invitations. They should match the tone or theme of the luncheon. If it's a casual bash, use informal invites. If the luncheon is super casual, you can even invite guests by phone or by email alone. If your luncheon is a high tea, a sit-down meal or a wine tasting, for instance, the invitations should reflect that style.
It only takes a few simple steps to bring together a fabulous luncheon for the bride!
I'm betting your bash is going to be one of the best bachelorette luncheons ever!
Happy Showering,
Susan "The Shower Diva"
Where Fun Reigns!™
